I’m 30 😳

This past Saturday (June 13, 2020), I turned 30-years-old. I wish I could say that the time leading up to it was filled with me having a positive attitude and being optimistic about what 30 would bring, but, that’s too much like right lol.

I had planned a birthday trip with three of my friends. We were all set to head to Punta Cana on the 15th (today) because I wanted to be home to celebrate my birthday on the actual day with my parents. Excitement was growing! Anticipation was upon us! That’s normal for my birthday trips, but this time, things didn’t go as planned. In February I was coming home from Iceland from one of my friend’s birthday celebration. After we exited the plane, we were stopped in customs. We were all confused because like what’s the problem?! Time goes by and we find out it was because someone from China was on our flight. Ok? But what does that mean and what does that have to do with us? Well you see, that was the start of the corona virus throwing monkey wrenches into my life!

Time goes on, The Rona is running rampant. May comes along and I’m like aight y’all, it’s time to give up on us still being able to go away next month. So we officially cancelled the trip about four weeks ago. I was pretty disappointed to say the least. Everyone was telling me, “aww you can reschedule the trip and go anytime”. But it was bigger than that to me. It represented more than just a birthday celebration. To me it was kind of representing me not having certain things that I desired in my life and the continuous postponement of them. I started to get in my feelings. Like I had so many things planned for my life that just hadn’t happened yet or seemed to have been hung up, just hanging in the balance. Like where’s all of my dreams and aspirations that have yet to come true? Why am I still waiting for certain things to be fulfilled when I’m almost 30?!? Is it too late? Did I miss my time? Do I simply not deserve it?!

Since I was in my feelings and didn’t want to be, I figured I would kinda just ignore my birthday. But then, one of my best friends texted me and asked what I had planned since we were no longer going away. I told her nothing and she said that she wanted to plan something. I gave push back and said no. At the time, the weather wasn’t looking to promising so I definitely wasn’t in the mood to set myself up for yet another possible disappointment pertaining to this birthday. Plus, I wasn’t really sure HOW to let someone else plan for me. Like I didn’t know how to release that control. She kept asking and I kept shooting it down. Then one day I realized something, I was completely disregarding something that someone else was trying to do for me to show me how important I am to them! I was robbing them of an opportunity that God was giving them to show me how much I am loved by Him and my loved ones. So I finally told her yes.

After I said yes, she got busy planning. She selected her planning team and got busy working! My excitement was growing! The weather was looking good and I just wanted to spend my day with people who love me. Plus, this was the first time (since childhood) that someone else was planning my birthday for me!! The only thing I knew was where to show up and what time. I didn’t who was coming. She wouldn’t even tell me how many people so that I could make little goodie bags, she simply told me to mind my business lol 😆 I tried to order some decorations and of course I was told to chill. It was getting closer and I just felt it in my bones that it was gonna be good. One of my homies asked me what I wanted for my birthday and I said, “To have a nice chills day where I know my people love me and for my cash app alerts to be boomin!” 😂

So the day comes!

I get one particular text that read, “ Happpyyy BIRTHDAY QUEEN!!!!!! I love u soooo much!! I hope u have an amazing day!!!!!!”. That right there let me know that they day was going to be amazing. One of my friends had already texted me and told me that he loves me. That was all of the confirmation that I needed, I knew it would be a birthday for the books!

So I get to the park and I’m waiting in the car to be instructed on where exactly to go. Nia comes to get me and we walk up to where everyone was. When I tell you, you could just feel the love, I MEAN IT! Everyone was so excited as if it was their own birthday, so I’m really not sure if I was more exited or they were!!! They were screaming and launching confetti. We had so much food and so many drinks and so many laughs and so much fun!!! We talked, played cards, danced, played with water guns, indulged in other grown up activities🙃, sang happy birthday, and really just enjoyed each other!  The day literally got away from us! We all left with a smile on our faces and our bellies full. At no point did I stop and wish I was on the beach in another country, I was right where I belonged. After that I continued my celebration at my parents‘ house with them, my aunt, cousin, and brother. More food. More laughs. More love. 

Nia, Brit, Kiwi, Ry, Rach, Tiph, Kenny, Vic, Brandon, Lijah, Tiara, and Siena, THANK YOU FOR THE BEST SEMI-SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY EVER! This was literally the best birthday ever! I didn’t get to travel but it was everything that I didn’t know I needed. I said that I wanted to be surrounded by people who love me and I was. Who knew that traveling to the park would have been even better than a trip?! I surely didn’t, but I’m so grateful my answer HAD to change to yes! 

I walked into 30 with my faith strong. My head is held high. I believe I can and will do anything that I set my mind to because I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13). I believe that I don’t have to settle for less. I believe that the victory belongs to me and the abundant life is here.

Moral of the story is, relinquish your plans! I promise you, trying to hold on so tightly to what you think you want, AINT it! Let go and watch how things come together even better than what you imagined they would be, even if they look different than what you believe it should be! When someone is trying to do something nice for you, stop insulting them and LET THEM! It’s ok to take your hands off of things and allow people to show up for you, to celebrate you, to love you. Just make sure you give that same type of love to your people! Thirty may not have looked like what I thought it would, but I’m so glad that it didn’t and so glad to see what’s yet to come! I know that the best of my life is still ahead of me and I’m ecstatic for the changes that shall come forth! Y’all don’t be surprised when I’m married and pregnant next year either, haha just kidding, kinda, maybe 🤔 aight idk 🤷🏽‍♀️ Bye 😆😂.

❤️MrR❤️

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